Advice, anyone?
Following on the heels of my post on further disillusionment with church, I might as well post about how my daughter is once again begging me to go to church. I've said how we hope to be part of a house church some day, and she strongly said that she doesn't want that, she wants to go to "Public Church" (the parallel to home schooling/public schooling).
I've been weighing out the factors:
1. I hate being in church
2. My kids could actually learn something good in church
3. My kids would probably enjoy being around other children
4. My kids could learn weird things in church
5. I'm am concerned about the ethics of spending large amounts of money on staffing and buildings instead of using the money to meet other pressing needs in the community and in the world.
6. I have no idea where to go if I decided to just let Taryn do what she wanted.
I've been weighing out the factors:
1. I hate being in church
2. My kids could actually learn something good in church
3. My kids would probably enjoy being around other children
4. My kids could learn weird things in church
5. I'm am concerned about the ethics of spending large amounts of money on staffing and buildings instead of using the money to meet other pressing needs in the community and in the world.
6. I have no idea where to go if I decided to just let Taryn do what she wanted.
posted by Jude | 7:53 PM
3 Comments:
It's all so relative isn't it? What is church? I know you know what it is... so I won't expand. What is the "gathering" we call church? just that. A gathering of "the church". Church is not something we do. It's something we are. I don't think synagogue was "house-churchy" or that it was doing anything much more than "reading and singing". But Jesus went. Were there Pharisees there? Yep. Were there Saducees there? Yep (Reading about these sects in Philip Yancey's The Jesus I Never Knew proved VERY interesting today). Basicallly, there were hypocrites, and self righteous bigots, and legalistic folks there. It wasn't "pretty". The church in Corinth *so* wasn't pretty (check out Mark Driscoll's www.marshill.org series on Corinth) and yet we are exhorted to continue to congregate and "contribute" to these "not pretty" local bodies. Why? Because we are a vital part. You my dear and your husband with your sharp wit, your passionate hearts and your wisdom and experience are vital and necessary parts. You add salt to the mix, and as much as the demons of cynicism and negativism would like us to believe (because I really can relate to where you are coming from) WE miss out by not being there.
Sometimes it feels more like a boiling pot than a healng ray of gentle sunlight, but it's in the "pot" that our dross can come to the surface, and we can be refined. It's not about attaining perfection, it's about perfecting the fruits in every circumstance, even the not so pretty "family" circumstances.
And frankly. Our kids need to know that nobody is perfect. That
the church needs a redeemer. That he is the only one we can trust and put our hope in.
For the longest time Church has been a "discipline" to me. And I haven't ditched it as much as I've wanted to. Now, the discipline has served to change me. To make me more Christlike in my response to things. It's good to not be satisfied with the status quo. It's good to question the validity of age old practice grown stale by repetition. It's good to challenge and work for revival. But in all of this, we must exercise the fruits to the fullest. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulnes, self control. SO HARD to be the first things while exercising the second. For me, this is my challenge. And I dwell on the first fruit alot. What does love look like? It's also patient, it believes the best, hopes the best, never gives up, you know that whole 1 Corinthians list.
Well girlfriend, you asked..... ;-)I commit to pray for you and yours.
My mom always told us that she always picked a church that we liked. When we were teens...she attended the church where we had positive Christian peers. (where our youthgroup was) Now she doesn't go to church, but she says "I never did need church. My relationship with God never hinged on it. I spend time in prayer, have good friends, and my own worship time. I always did it so you guys could have good relationship with other christian kids"
I think of that now...and when we were wondering about how to do church here in Ottawa (we did a house-church for a while) we let our kids lead us. We went where we saw the most growth in them...even if it wasn't the perfect scenario for us per se.
These are the questions that are running through my head.
Why is she so insistent?
Could Jesus be speaking through her? If so what is he saying?
Could there be a hunger in her for something?
My other thought is that whatever you decide, make it a family decision and then make it something you commit to do as a family.
My practical thoughts are
Take turns being the leader in this area and see where it takes you. I think you as parents can provide some direction, set a framework of what you want "spiritual expresion" to follow, (eg. our house rules for being angry=no destruction of self, others, or property) but other then the frame work, let it go. See where it takes you. What will you discover about each other, yourself, your families needs?
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