Things I don't like to think about

I had an REM song going through my head and when I googled for the lyrics I came across Losing My Religion, done by a couple of ex-fundies. Here's a quote from their FAQs.

Why do you say God is immoral, unfair and cruel?
First, the Bible and Christians say this about God, not us. We merely point out how they do. The best way to see this is to read some of our essays on things like heaven and hell, and salvation. Briefly, however, here are a few reasons.

Immoral and cruel: turning someone into a pillar of salt, killing 50,000+ bystanders because a few looked into the Ark of the Covenant, ordering the genocide of an entire race, including all the infants and animals, and tormenting people forever because of their religion. Christianity makes God to be worse than any human dictator.

Unfair: punishing people infinitely for finite crimes, punishing people eternally and sadistically (there is no remedial value to hell, so its purpose is merely to inflict pain), holding people equally accountable to the Gospel message once they've heard it, regardless of their situation or background (or lifespan), and healing a teary-eyed believer at a Benny Hinn crusade, while ignoring the pleas of starving children who die by the thousands every day.

These are the kinds of things that I only allow in my mind momentarily, before I either apply a pat answer, assume that it's just beyond our human understanding, or forcefully change topics internally. The idea of a loving God just doesn't seem to gel with the OT. What am I missing? Or am I missing anything?